that time i was a model... part 1

this was one of the craziest, most terrifying, absolutely exhilarating & surreal things i have ever done.   this was a very yaya-womanhood-hear me roar sorta move. but this was something that i needed to do. something i needed to do, for myself.

the backstory

if you're not familiar with elizabeth suzann, she's a clothing designer in nashville, tennessee. read more about her vision & story here. i've been following her journey on instagram for a while now. so long, in fact, that i can't even remember how or when i came across her ig account. i loved her design aesthetic. i loved all the linen. the cut of the fabrics seemed so flattering, yet comfortable & easily transitional for the seasons. finally, for christmas last year, i decided i was long overdue for one of her pieces. best decision ever. i had been working with a capsule wardrobe for a while then & the harper tunic was the perfect addition to my closet. i found myself wearing it all.the.time.

i know some worry about the expense of her pieces but here's what i found to be true: every time i would go into target, i would pick up a new top, cardigan, purse & shoes. every time i would walk past a sale rack at old navy, i'd grab a few tees. i would plan shopping trips to the biggest malls so i could walk to every store & just see what there might be out there for me to buy. and then buy it. not really ever loving it. not really sure if it fit. but it was a "good deal" so i did it. cha-ching, cha-ching. but when i started consciously buying clothes, i downsized, A LOT. spending definitely decreased, too. and now i buy more purposefully & with long-term in mind. 

the harper tunic was a dream & in february i was featured in my harper tunic on ES's instagram & received a $250 gift card because of it!

i used that gift card to buy their linen diane trench which was just like the ones i have had pinned on my pinterest for years! so super pumped at this point, guys!!

then on july 10, ES announced they were looking for real ES customers & women from all shapes, sizes, ages & backgrounds to come to nashville & be photographed in every one of their signature garments so that customers can confidently envision a garment future in her own wardrobe. i read & liked the post on ig & quickly got a notification that liz, herself, had mentioned me on her comment feed saying, "@hellolittlenest Thought you may be interested! :)" GAH. she called me out. WHY. WHAT. HUH. i may have freaked a bit. thankfully my 13 year old daughter was there to share in my enthusiasm & quickly told me to APPLY ALREADY. so emma took my body & headshot (lol) & i emailed them right away with the answers to their questionnaire & then crossed my fingers & toes. on july 15, while out of town in a hotel room with my in-laws, i got the email. i definitely stopped breathing & then started jumping around shouting. again, thank goodness emma was there to appreciate & participate in my enthusiasm.

the campaign was to be shot august 12-13, so for the next month i obsessively thought about numbers. measurements, sizes, weights, dates, gates, oh my. hubs finally slapped some sense into me & told me to quit worrying & dreading everything & just enjoy this process & opportunity. 

did i mention that i'd never travelled alone before? or flown at all before? or even been to an airport before? or even really knew what an airbnb was? or ever actually seen an uber? or ever been to nashville? sure, i'll stop worrying. right now. now.

we each got one of these nifty information folders & things got really real. 

the flight

it's thursday night & i'm packing. i received an email from ES saying we needed to have our hair basically done when we arrive to the photoshoot on saturday. it is then that i realize emma took the only straightener we have with her to her grandma's because she had sports pictures the next morning. i started texting aunts, friends, neighbors, anyone who at 9 pm could lend me a straightener for the weekend. thankfully, i have the best neighbors in the world & one of them delivered theirs to my door in the middle of the night. just call us mayberry.

my flight was at 7:10 a.m. out of port columbus, 2.5 hours away. here's how friday went:

2 a.m. i wake up. "what the heck am i doing??!" (2 a.m.-maybe not the most coherent time to deliberate semi-big life decisions).

2:30 we leave our house & i remember our van is out of gas. and there aren't any 24 gas stations near us. WHO KNEW. well, i do now. i live life on a learning curve.

2:40 i'm checking on all my cash/funds & we realize our direct deposit for pay day hasn't went through yet. super awesome.

3:00 we come upon an overturned tractor trailer, ems workers, police, the likes. it is blocking the highway but we manage to get through one lane.

3:02 no joke. another car accident on the highway. flares, first responders & emergency personnel everywhere. IS THIS A SIGN???

3:46 i can't believe i'm doing this. this is ridiculous. who am i???

5:04 we're at the airport. dang, airports are so cool. (i can't stop smiling.)

5:05 i'm not as nervous as i thought i'd be.

5:06 i go to the bathroom & i see people who live the next street over from us IN THE AIRPORT BATHROOM & it makes me so weirdly happy.

5:09 we say goodbye.

5:30 tsa are not as scary or mean as i thought they'd be! actually super helpful!

6:30 waiting at my gate & hardcore people watching. who needs a book to read??!

6:35 start to think about who would survive if we crashed & found ourselves on a deserted island.

6:36 i've watched too much LOST this summer.

6:37 i'd totally be kate austen.

6:41 LOADING the plane through one of those tunnel things that you always see on movies. 

7:00 found my seat on the plane next to a very interesting mom/daughter duo (think dog the bounty hunter meets laguna beach).

7:10 we are flying & i LOVE it. seriously beautiful & incredibly peaceful.

 

8:27 (ohio time) / 7:27 (nashville time) i land in nashville!! just when i was getting settled into the flight, we were descending. i'm not ready, southwest! gimme more!

7:30 (nashville time) i can't check into my airbnb until 12 so i spend the next 4 HOURS hanging out at the airport a la tom hanks in terminal.

9:30 after checking out all the shops, i grab breakfast: my first auntie anne's pretzel that i didn't have to share with someone! big things happening on this trip, friends.

10:37 i hit the bar. the massage bar that is. is it weird to get a massage from strange people while other strange people are walking by & watching?? maybe. it was worth it.

11:15 feeling relaxed from the massage that i got. so relaxed, in fact, that i fell asleep during it...3 times. 

11:28 o'charley's for lunch: chicken tenders with honey mustard, sweet potato fries & a house salad with ranch & a sweet tea. yummo. 

12:50 meet my first uber, greg! who kept asking me which way was the right way. greg, i do not know. i'm paying you to get me where i need to go. check your gps, greg. good ole, greg.

1:02 got to my airbnb safely! in one piece! i made it! it was seriously the most relieving feeling. cue "miss independent" track! (i love you, kelly clarkson.)

well, there it is! how this trip/opportunity came to be & how i got there. i will pick up with arriving to my airbnb on the next post...along with our behind-the-scenes tour of ES studio/living room/offices, our team dinner, behind the scenes at our photoshoot & the teensy bit of sightseeing i did in nashville! stay tuned, friends!

365 days with an olive

i can specifically remember, not long after our olive was born, daydreaming about her first birthday.

you see, after 3 kids & 13 years worth of birthdays, it becomes very difficult to come up with new/original ideas for birthday parties. we had to start brainstorming early on this one.

emma & i were talking about books & movies we love & we both mentioned the secret garden (naturally). that tiny lightbulb above my head lit up like a christmas tree. olive's first birthday would be a secret garden theme. flowers & birdcages & silver & lace & tea cups. it was settled. and we started planning.

diy invites that we just loved, loved, loved

she was born may 21, 2015 ||

we celebrated her birthday one year to the day. since we're talking about spring in ohio, that could mean a myriad of weather conditions so we were holding our breaths the whole week. i was desperately set on having the party outside. i mean, it's a secret garden party...it cannot be INSIDE. naturally, the forecast called for rain. but i'm incredibly stubborn. henceforth, i did not start decorating until one hour before the party--convinced i would be able to pull this off outside. when the radar showed a slight opening in rain possibilities from 6-8pm-ish...game on. thankfully my mom & hubs let me boss them a bit & we got everything moved outside in a flash. (they love me for who i am, mmmmkay.)

so anyway, we made it through the food, jumped right into singing & cutting cake, and began opening presents. zip-a-dee-doo-dah. hurry, hurry, hurry. about halfway through gifts...raaaain. you should have seen olive's cute little face. her rapid blinking from the raindrops hitting her face. confusion about what exactly was happening to her & why no one was doing anything about it. hi, i'm stubborn. have we covered that yet? i thought maaaaybe the rain would stop & we could finish the gifts. that did not happen. thankfully, my dad who is THE most prepared person i know, had already began taking the food & decorations into the house. (GUYS he knew to save my vintage books first...what a gem.) so everyone grabbed their chairs, purses, gifts & children & ran inside. inside. to my quaint little 900 sq ft home. inside. to my like 10x14 living space & entryway. it became a very intimate party, very quickly. making memories, as my dad would say... 

that is one of the things i'm most thankful for--that spirit of spontaneity that he instilled in me. that attitude of everything's okay, even if it's all falling apart. roll with the punches, friends.

okay, so, more details...

decorating details: 

we used the silver serving trays & pitcher that had belonged to my grandma & late great grandmother on my dad's side; the jewelry in the trinket box also belonged to my late great grandmother (i love that these little pieces of our family were able to be a part of the celebration of this little life--even if the people themselves could not be there); the floral china was gifted to me by my grandma on my mother's side on our wedding day; olive's high chair was gifted to us by a former employee of my husband who told us it was over 100 years old & once belonged to the smucker's family; one of the side tables we used for serving was found on the side of the road by me; the table we used for the drinks was made by hubs; the lace table runners were lent to us by my mother & a friend; the same friend made the cakes for us; another friend made the ONE cake topper; the jars, bottles & vintage books were all items i previously thrifted; the CARDS suitcase i had made previously for a friend's wedding. 

gifting details: 

olive received a newborn cabbage patch doll; a vintage fisher-price barn, tractor & animals; a flamingo purse; a light-up nursery rhyme book; dresses; jam jams; swimsuits, shoes & more. from us? this plant romper by tiny cottons (below) & an inflatable pool for her & siblings to play in this summer. and when she was done opening presents, she stood & gave a standing ovation. everyone joined in on the clapping. they smiled. she smiled. i cried.

onto an obscene amount of first birthday party photos!!! roll that beautiful bean footage...

olive's secret garden birthday

other highlights:

-i am not a fan of the baby smash cakes but i'm really glad i got one because baby girl tore.it.up.

-i forgot to buy forks for the cake & miraculously had some plastic forks. not enough, but some. and had to use some of our metal forks. still not enough. so i didn't eat cake & took other people's plastic forks when they were done & washed them so other people had some. i told no one.

-my dad said it was the fanciest first birthday party he's ever been to. i took that as a compliment.

-my mom & dad then proceeded to tell me that no one came to MY first birthday & we all had an awkwardly sad laugh about that.

-as if it even matters, but i'm still kicking myself for forgetting a few of the decorations. no one knows but me. but i know. i know.

olive deering, 

you are completely & wholly adored. 

we cannot imagine our crazy tribe without your dimpled face.

everything you do is brand new.

as if no other baby has ever clapped before.

we've been waiting for you & we didn't even know it.

for the times you've been dropped, bopped or stepped on, we are sorry.

the amount of hugs & kisses you've received surely make up for that.

xo

your unostentatious mom, dad, bub & sisters

{ instagram tag #olivessecretgarden or check out our other birthdays with the tag #thebirthdayfiles }